Easier Said Than Done

Okay so...I've usually been a proponent of 'honesty is the best policy.' I think folks should be upfront, clear and forward with how they feel. And this is what I pass on to my guy friends when they tell me the tales of the woman that just won't go away. She may be nice enough or she may be crazy or any number of things in between. But, either way, they claim they don't want to be in a relationship with or hang out with or mislead them. So, I always simply say, Well...did you tell them that?? I tell them how they can't expect someone to go away or to know that they aren't interested in them in the same ways without you directly coming out and saying so. I joke with them about being scared of the woman or sometimes I dole out tough love telling them that should either just come out and say it or stop complaining about her being around. But, as I've come to find out, it's not always so easy to do. I am still a strong advocate for clear and direct, but I know that it may not always be so black and white.

I found myself in a similar situation where one of my guy friends appears and acts as though he is interested in somewhat more than I am. And while I genuinely like him and enjoying hanging out with him and all that, I have no inclination for something more than that. It has gotten me in precarious situations that are sometimes a little difficult to get out of. So, I'm thinking to myself that I have to do something about this. I have to tell him that I'm not interested in our friendship going in that direction. I don't want to hurt his feelings. I don't want to lose the coolness of our friendship. I'd like for us to still hang out and have fun. I don't want things to be awkward. Hmmm...so I guess it's not as easy as I thought it should be. Now, the guy is not by any means in love with me or falling me around with an engagement ring, I just know that there are some directions that he's interested in going with me that I'm not with him. What to do? What to say? How can I clearly express my feelings on what I do and don't want without hurting his feelings or bruising his ego or losing the friendship? I guess there are no guarantees on the outcome. But, the friendship could take a bad turn if I don't say something on this end. So, although it turns out that this is much easier said than done, I still have to do it, huh?

Man. I guess I'll have to grant pardons to all my boys who have been recipients of my tough love 'just be a man and tell her' speeches. At least this time. Lol. Not to worry though, I'm sure they'll come up with some other reason for me to step up on the friend-girl soapbox to dish out some helpful hints.